The best day of my life was the day I once again fell flat on my face, and I didn’t jump back up.
I know that the preceding declaration defies all conventional wisdom and blows more than a few Hallmark sentiments right off the rack. How many times have we heard that no matter how many times we get knocked down the important thing is that we get back up? Yet after unconsciously following that advice for a decade or so I found that the greater wisdom came from exploring why it was that I kept landing on the proverbial floor. After getting up repeatedly only to fall once again I began to get the sense that it was on the floor that I actually needed to be.
We are a take charge culture. We are a people that take the bull by the horns. The macro-power that is the United States of America is comprised of micro-units of making things happen individuals. If we are ruthlessly honest the vast majority of us are in many ways control freaks. We continually fight reality be it internal or societal. We are in a perpetual struggle with what already is. Even in areas of spiritual aspiration we demand that the Universe act in a way that we deem right and appropriate and comfortable. We decide what we think we want and we expect Life to line up and to give it to us in a certain way and in our specified time frame. And when that doesn’t happen we rush to blame any number of external factors from our significant others to our Kindergarten experiences. Or we simply think that our mystical magical wand is broken or that we aren’t in on the real Secret.
I am plum tired of fighting reality. I am worn out from trying to control what ultimately is uncontrollable. I am weary of seeking to manipulate Universal Principle in order to fix what my surface mind swears is broken. I am exhausted from pushing against the parts of myself I so want to be rid of. I have lost total interest in turning myself every which way but loose in an effort to get the love and affirmation I feel I’ve never had. I have finally accumulated enough evidence that my way isn’t the best way, and I am open to a Higher wisdom than my own perceptual system. I am relaxing open and exhaling freely into the Knowing that there is a flow to Life that swimming against will never prevail. Life is for me and it is only my fearful need to control and to manipulate that keeps me from the felt-experience of that Force.
I guess what I am really seeking to say is that I am surrendering my story into my Source. I am surrendering what I think needs to change into a Clarity that sees beyond appearances and easily orchestrates a blessed transcendence within me. There is nothing as futile as seeking to change what already is. There is nothing as freeing as releasing the grip and surrendering into a deep Knowingness that within the Flow of Sourced-emergence all is well and will always be well. The linear mind will never get that, and the heart has always known it. It is a spiritual axiom that it is only in surrender that True power is found. It is only in giving up the fight that the internal war is won. When we choose to arm wrestle with the Universe we will eventually wear down. And it is in that broken surrender that the resplendence of Source shines through. It is from the moment that you feel most weak that the greatest strength is born.
If you are tired of struggling, and straining and figuring and fixing and demanding and controlling: consider a different tact. Relax. No, really. Relax. Let go into letting Be. Feel the flow of Life that is seeking to Live as you. Surrender into that river of life. Let it carry you easily, gently. As I frequently tell a beloved friend; give it a rest. Surrender, Dorothy! And then watch what authentic power can do through you.
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