I suspected it would be true: the less time I have, the more precious it is.
I never dreamed that I would embrace my latter years as much as I am. Even as I am facing life without my husband and as I face diminishing physical ability the sand that is left in the top of my hourglass keeps me focused, intententional, and grateful.
I am by nature a disciplined and organized person. I pay attention to how I am living. To what is fueling what I am doing. To my values. To what I am contributing. My energy is precious and vital to me. I know that it contributes to the greater good of the whole when I am aligned with my Soul priorities.
I have for many years had a personal manifesto. A type of constitution for how I live and operate. I let it govern me to the best of my ability.
My manifesto is a living document. I use it, access it in decision making. It is fluid and changeable when I feel as if I have outgrown one of my precepts. It is permeated with prayer. In fact, it is a prayer.
In a world that has become so chaotic and disruptive my manifesto is more important than ever. It is my invariant constant in a stormy world. It is a beacon in such intense darkness. Regardless of all the insanity around me my manifesto helps keep me grounded and anchored. Stable. Centered.
I will not get into the specifics of my personal document. I do believe it is evident by how I live. At least that is my goal. And it is one of the few goals that remain for me.
Achievement and success are truly no longer important for me. I have climbed enough mountains and crossed enough bridges. I have done enough. That does not mean I will sit and stare for the duration. It means for me that how I do things is way more consequential than what I am doing.
I am content to do way less yet with more focus and intention. My activity level is considerably less that in previous years. When I go somewhere I am very mindful of the energy I bring to the space I am in. How I treat others, both internally and interactionally. I want to leave space better than I found it.
And with less years ahead the urgency for contribution is amplified. Not in an ambitious sense. The urgency isn’t drive. It is a vitality that moves me through my days and helps me select what is most worthy of engagement. I don’t have time to waste. And how I spend my time is often directly shaped by my manifesto. By my priorities.
I am mindful these days that my next birthday will be my seventieth. I am still nine months off. Yet it has prompted me to do an even deeper dive into my current manifesto, and to determine where some updating may be in order.
I love the process! I love deeper dives. I relish giving time and attention to the things and processes that are most precious and important to me. And I celebrate that I am at a place in life where while my manifesto is a document of personal choice it is dedicated to something much larger than me.
I offer the remainder of my days to be dedicated to the collective more than to my individual goals or wants. I intend to die having fulfilled my purpose. I would love to think I leave having given more than I have taken. I want to be a man of my word. A beneficial presence upon this planet. And my manifesto guides me in that pursuit.
This late life revision could well be my last. I will continue to tweak. Yet I am poised to pray and to intuit how I will live the remainder of my days, weeks, months, years. I cannot know and am frankly not all that concerned with the duration.
It is the quality of contribution that matters most to me. I did some silly and unskillful things earlier in my life. I was focused on things that seem so inconsequential now. Yet it took what it took. If that chaos was necessary to bring me to where I am today, then so be it.
It is a late life manifesto. I am giving myself ample time to steep and to pray it into being. I trust my intuition impeccably. I listen relentlessly to the call of my heart. I open to guidance and I let it govern me.
And I know I can face anything that happens in these latter years of my life. With faith in my heart and my manifesto in my mind I have confidence that the rest of my years can be the best of years.
And it is because I say it is.
