FLORIDA POWER AND LIGHT

Beyond what the title suggests this musing is not about public utilities, or only for people who live in Florida.

This musing is an invitation to anyone who chooses to read and to accept this reminder that we are each here to learn that there is an incredible and Cosmic Power within us all. The conscious usage and direction of this internal Power is why we are here. It is the Only Power that will set us free. It is the misusing of this Power that has locked us in bondage. Mired in amnesia we have turned the Power of heaven into a nightmarish hell. Literally in the blink of an eye we can redirect this Power to turn that hell into a realm of all-inclusive heaven.

As long as we are dominated by externals we are blinded by misperception. We are fighting the artifacts of our own miscreation. We scream at effects as if they are independent of what we ourselves have done. This happens both individually and collectively.

While this manifest realm is governed by what seems to be two powers of darkness and Light, that experience is merely relative. There is light and the absence of Light. Even that description itself is relative. Light is always and ever present. Yet in our identification with density we cannot perceive it. It is never missing. We just misperceive it.

The realization of this all-inclusive Power is what salvation is all about. The re-establishment of vision is seeing what is not yet physically present. It is not what we see but how we see.

This is the task of the incredibly powerful.

This is far beyond “woo-woo” spirituality. It is far beyond just vision-boarding what you want. It is far beyond concept or positive thinking.

It is claiming radical responsibility for the Power that is within us. The Power we were made from and have been entrusted with. It is owning that every thought, feeling, word is a unit of Power that will always result in consequence.

When we come from egoic amnesia we misuse this power. When we demean and dehumanize we literally God-damn other Divine beings. We place ideology before the Power of the collective I am. We fight and we use our Power to augment the problems our own consciousness has miscreated.

When we consciously come from the authentic Power within, we literally bring forth the Godness of our True being. We see not only with our eyes. We engage the vision of our hearts. We do not deny injustice or tragedy. We transmute it with our unwavering presence. We are tireless in facing our own inner demons. We do it on behalf of all beings.

When others become less, we stand strong and become more. We care, we compassion, and we shine forth with a transformative Power. We use what we are in Truth to serve all living beings. This makes our every moment an act of service.

So, because I live in Florida, I am a utility of Power and Light generating from this place in geography. And that Power and Light shines holographically throughout the Universe. I am a channel for that Power here in this manifest realm. By staying awake to the Power within me I am a conscious contribution, moment by moment.

When I forget and begin to fight externals, I sense down in my body the disempowerment that registers as discomfort. I bless this signal, and I shift to reconnect and reaffirm that I am a channel and a being for this Power and Light to shine forth from within. I am grateful to know that though I can dim down, my Light can never be extinguished. Prayer reignites me and I align to shine again.

I am not responsible for this Power, yet I am accountable to it. I am here to humbly own this Power as my purpose and my passion. I use this platform to remind you that this same Power is also in you.

For Florida and for the globe, I am choosing to express and shine forth as Power and Light within this world. It truly is a moment by moment choice. It requires radical honesty, relentless humility, and vigilant visioning.

And it is a choice I was born to make.

NOTORIOUS GOOD TROUBLE

I am suspecting it is time for me to start a bit of good trouble.

It is beyond unsettling for me that in these incredibly troubling times we are also experiencing the loss of two individuals that I consider to be among our greatest American heroes.

John Lewis. Ruth Bader Ginsburg.

Good trouble. Notorious.

I will not go into their incredible accomplishments here. Their contributions could fill volumes. Suffice it to say that they used their talents, intellects, faith, drive, their very lives in serving something greater than themselves. They were relentless public servants. They overcame obstacles and prejudices in order that the overcoming would pave the way and inspire others. They courageously challenged the status quo, risking themselves to uplift others. Through various forms of repeated adversity, they continuously pushed the boundaries of what had been, to make room for what was seeking to be.

He spent his life starting good trouble that benefited us all. She inadvertently became known as notorious just by being what she naturally was. I think she started more than her share of good trouble. And I think John Lewis was gorgeously notorious.

And just when we most need a huge helping of notorious good trouble, they are gone.

Or are they?

I can vividly feel their energy as I type these words. I can hear their words, and the tone with which they delivered them. I can see them laughing, and I can see them crying. They led us bravely, and they inspired us relentlessly. They set a high bar, and they also gave us clear directions how to jump the hurtles now before us. They continued fighting and serving through incredible health challenges. They showed up fully and authentically right up to the end.

And now?

They will be heroes for me for as long as I live. I know my world is better because of how they chose to live and to serve. I beyond admire them. I mourn their passing. I grieve.

And now I must act.

I was taught from the earliest age not to ever start trouble. Nobody likes a troublemaker, Taylor. Stay in your lane. Obey the rules. Do not ruffle too many feathers, and certainly do not offend those in power. Blending in is safer than standing out. And notorious? No way. Not in my tribe.

I am breathing a bit more deeply as I bring forth the energy in my heart and shape it into words. I feel some fluttering in my gut, and a slight constriction in my throat. My pulse seems to have quickened.

Can it be?

I can speak about my heroes. I can blog about their remarkable character and accomplishments. I can grieve and lament the loss.

And beyond that I can become a little more of what they inspired in me.

I will never face the unbearable torment visited upon John Lewis. I will never know the hardships and obstacles placed in front of Ruth Bader Ginsburg. I will never serve in Congress of sit upon the Supreme Court.

But I can start a little good trouble right where I am.

I can be a little more notorious in how I confront injustice. In how I speak truth to power. In how I live and in how I love.

It is said that what we admire is a quality that must be within ourselves. We could not recognize these admirable traits if we did not also possess them.

So, somewhere in my Light shadow is a troublemaker for good. Lurking somewhere just out of awareness is a notorious being simmering to express.

In honor of my heroes I am going to notoriously start a little good trouble. I am going to get out of lane. I am going to stand up taller and speak out more clearly. I am going to risk the ridicule. In fact, I will relish it.

Fitting in is highly overrated.

Thank you, John Lewis.

Thank you, Ruth Bader Ginsburg.

You will never cease to inspire me. I will never cease to hold you in a heartful of gratitude and deep love.

And I will do more than just remember you. I will share a little more of you. A littler more trouble. Good trouble. Notorious good trouble.

And I know at some level you will be with me. Cheering me on. With angels like you, there will be trouble for sure.

PLACES ACT THREE

If as if Shakespeare said “all the world is a stage” this is turning out to be one elongated intermission.

After six months spent primarily at home due to the pandemic, I have come to the deep-seated recognition that I am entering the third and final act of my life. This recognition fills me with a personal sense of profound curiosity and wonder. I say that I am entering the third act because it truly feels as if this time of distancing is a period of cosmically enforced time out. A time of extended intermission. I feel as if this is a pause between the second and third acts of my life experience. It is not that I am not fully engaged in what is happening. It is more that it is such a unique and more solitary perspective that I feel both paused and vitally involved. Awake spiritually though distanced physically. There is a simmering of “yes, but not yet” right below the surface.

Though working full time albeit at home I have added time to reflect on what has occurred during the first and second acts of my life. There was the setting of the stage and plot. There was character introduction and development. There were the unfolding’s of the patterns and conflicts that I came here to rumble with and eventually resolve. There were many years of becoming that have been achieved by what at times felt like endless struggle, mistake making, and ego wrestling. It has been a messy story line. Plots have not unfolded according to this script writer. Countless people have not followed those scripts or spoken the lines I wanted them to speak.

Act one ended with the thud of me hitting the pavement. The folly of my attempts at control would leave the most audacious audience members wincing and hitting the bar during the first intermission. They would do so even though they had just witnessed what hitting the bar too often can do to a human life.

So act one lasted a long and adventurous thirty three years.

Act two begins with our hero (me) moving through incredible and mostly unforeseen changes and challenges. Still bruised from act one I had no inkling how dramatic act two would turn out to be. Generally speaking, it was a series of mountains to climb and rough seas to surf. I early on recognized that while in act one I was prone to initiating and instigating dramas for the sake of drama in act two the action had a distinct flavor of purposeful activity. I began to live with an unwavering sense that everything was a part of a greater emergence. Though there were many unexpected twists and turns I also had the sense that I was deliberately participating in the story line. It was all becoming clear that I was on a mission here. Everything that happened was feeding into that quest. It was all leading to something. It was messy and it was meaningful. The more I sensed purpose the less I pushed.

In act one I had jobs that supported me in what would become my career. Early on in act two career gave way to vocation. Trying to make my way in the world somehow landed me in living to serve the world. All the pain and struggle of act one and that of act two began to be channeled into ways to help others who were themselves struggling. I was plagued by self-doubt and incrimination for sure. As prayer softened this faulty sense of self that torment turned into compassion and mercy for others. Forgiveness became a higher and more precious practice. I slowly felt more stable and certain as to why things in this drama were happening as they were occurring.

Act two went on for a far less arduous thirty years.

This play within a play has lasted long enough for me to mostly know my way around this stage. Set pieces still get unexpectedly moved. But now I know how to adapt and respond with greater clarity and even equanimity. I have become masterful at adlibbing. I am far less demanding that others follow my script or stage directions. While I do not know how or when, I do live with a sense that everything is headed in a direction that will serve my characters greater evolution. I have a director that is Higher and Wiser than me and that makes all the difference for sure. My subtext has dramatically changed and so my lines and actions. I still run into the scenery and step on other people’s toes and lines from time to time. I periodically give into the temptation to upstage. Mostly acts one and two have tamed and tempered me.

I feel ready to face whatever the next act will reveal.

And then came an intermission that none of us saw coming.

I have come to see it as an inner-mission.

This has turned out to be a purposeful pause from my perspective. I have dedicated myself from the onset to staying as present and as prayerful as possible. I have remained alert to the suffering that is all around me and have actively sought to open to ways to alleviate that suffering. I decided that I would not deaden myself nor waste this time in mine and in human history. I have dived deeply within. I have faced things that I now know I desperately needed to face and unpack. I am different than I was even six months ago. I am still here and I know that it is for a reason. A reason bigger than just me.

And I am clear that this is my inner-mission before the start of act three of my life.

And so, I am exploring carefully how I will choose to show up for these final years of this adventure. I am relishing time, experiences, relationships with more fervor than ever. I feel that there will be far less mountains to climb or seas to surf. I am peaceful with that. I know there will be surprises. There will be challenges and changes and hurts and losses. I have groomed a lifetime to handle those. There will be no self-selected dramas. Simplicity is replacing thrill seeking. Peacefulness is my primary plan. And I will serve throughout the duration. The form will no doubt change. The vocation will not. Act three will bear the fruits of acts one and two.

At the end of act one I began to dread the future.

At the end of act two I have cleared most of the wreckage of the past and live primarily for the present.

Act three?

I await the Great stage manager to call places, letting me know the extended inner-mission has ended and that act three is finally ready to begin. In fact, I am already in a great place for whatever comes next. Let the action begin.

I look forward to seeing how this epic adventure plays out. How it all resolves. I know now that I am a great love story unfolding. It took a whole lot of drama to figure that out. A whole lot of drama.

The house lights may be dimming soon…