Tuesday, March 1, 2022

TENSION OF THE UNSPOKEN

I always thought that it was what I was saying that left me feeling exhausted.

Partially true.

I am finding more and more that it is what I am NOT saying that is the source of my disempowerment.

And disempowerment is exactly what it is.

I am going to try to keep this as brief as I can while also maintaining meaningfulness.

The Power of Life is given to us by virtue of our creation. The Power within us is always seeking to be made whole. It is co-creative, dynamic, and presents as the Word. This is not word in the traditional sense. It is Word as Co-creative Principle declared into experience. It is literally Word becoming incarnate. A felt-imbued Word is literally a Force of nature.

Humans possess self-reflecting consciousness and as a result can consciously word our worlds. That is awakened consciousness at its best. Having said that we each have a habitual commentary, a narrative that is constantly running through our minds. We are always commenting on what is. What we seldom realize is that our commentary determines our experience of what is. The commentary is never Truth and is rarely even true. We are meaning making machines. What we say, goes. Most of it is lies. Yet we think it is our truth. It is the nature of consciousness. It is meant to consciously flow from center to circumference. We are meant to use the Power of our words to co-create the best experience possible. “In the beginning is the Word” is a literal Truth within us. When something occurs that disturbs us, we are meant to meet it with an awakened awareness that knows it is a misuse of Word that can be changed. Not out there. In here.

Everything originates in here.

Almost all of us talk about things that we do not want to be true. Problem is when we describe we prescribe. To pour attention on something as you talk about it is a prophesy. What we focus on is a movie of coming attractions. As ancient Truth teaches our “words go forth and do not return empty.” The Word is a force of consciousness that goes forth, is acted upon by the Law, and returns as our experience. This is always happening at the individual and at the collective level. When many people talk about the same thing, we call it reality. It is, but only by virtue of our agreement.

Our opinion of that is irrelevant. It is Law.

While it is a point of triggering for many people the power of confession is a transformative part of this unfolding process. I do not mean confession in terms of entering a booth and talking to a priest. Confession is a conscious act of speaking of what is troubling or disturbing for the sake of redeeming the energy. It involves the acknowledgment that circumstances are in some way a product of our words. It shares with another the emotional reactions that are moving inside of us. It claims ownership for the experience. It allows a trusted other to witness this process for the sake of transforming it. We are called to share what we are thinking, feeling, experiencing. Not to make it more solid. To allow it to become more fluid.

Because an infinitesimal number of people are owning the power of the co-creative word it is being collectively misused. “Fake news” is running rampant. Our words are used to diminish ourselves and dehumanize others. We speak of what we don’t want and then blame the circumstances on others. This is the foundation of the disempowerment previously mentioned. We humans are making the messes, and then not owning that it is we who doing it. We project our unconscious word-stories on those we disagree with. It is the perfect scenario to perpetuate the stories.

Okay, this may not be so brief.

There is enormous Power in focused, collective consciousness. When “two or more are gathered” and put forth harmonic Words transformation must ensue. It is Law. What we are seeing as reality today is a critical mass of people collectively misusing the power of the word. The Law is working perfectly. The problem is in the words we are putting forth. The even deeper challenge is very few are choosing to forgive at a Causal level.

Part of the power of confession is to speak truthfully about the relative experience that is outpicturing. It is describing what is unfolding in honest and fearless terms. It is value based. It is using words in service of Truth. It is calling out lies. It is courageously speaking Truth which IS power. It is speaking up even when it is scary and conflict-inducing. It feels risky indeed.

And it is not nearly as risky as remaining silent.

I freely admit that I have misused words countless times during my lifetime. I frequently fall into the trap of prophesying what I do not want to flow forth. I am much more awake to this than I used to be. And I have room to grow for sure.

As the leader of a spiritual community, I am acutely aware of how I am responsible for how my words affect those I serve. There are many things I feel prompted to call out in service of what I see as a greater Truth. There are ideologies playing out that violate my personal value system. Our planet is being pilfered and people are being dehumanized. Rights are being stolen. People are being needlessly tormented and even extinguished. This is clearly from my perspective. And I have a right to live from what feels true and contributing for me.

While I love expressing my vocation as I am blessed to do, I also feel a growing tension between what I feel called to say and how that will land with congregants of dystonic perspectives. I feel an increasing dissonance inside of me between what I personally want to say, and the responsibility I have to minister to all people. I often feel a ball of energy sticking in my throat, a suppressed word that is seeking to come forth. I also know that what is true for me is only true for me. I do not speak for the board of directors, the staff, or the congregation. I can choose to try and only speak what is light, breezy. And that has never been my truth. I am a messenger of Truth to the best of my ability. And I am unmistakably called to speak about what gets in the way of that Truth.

This tension between free expression and community responsibility is the source of my tiredness. Not calling out what I feel needs to be called out is quite frankly, exhausting. I sincerely believe that we are to use Principle in intensely practical ways. We are to use our words to call out lies and to proclaim Truth into being. It has to be both. We are to convert “fake news” into Faith news.

And so today I am writing about this tension, knowing I open myself to public opinion and other evaluations. I am willing to take that risk. I know there is a part of me that is called to continue to serve a community while also feeling the inherent limitations of it. And I embrace the very clear part of me that longs to only be responsible for what I am called to say. To be responsible for my words. For the impact they have. For the contribution I can make. I welcome the tension, and beyond willing to learn from it.

It has been the words I have been withholding that has disempowered me. That I know for sure. My silence has been collusion. I am clear that I must find a way to internalize and integrate what seeks to express while also honoring if not always respecting opposing forces to my values and spiritual Truths. I am only here to speak for myself. And I am still called to speak to others. I trust that the tension between those dynamics is going to birth my next right expression.

Whether or not you agree with what I say I hope you will respect my right to say it. And if not, I bless you while continuing to speak my Truth.

Out loud. I always thought that it was what I was saying that left me feeling exhausted.

Partially true.

I am finding more and more that it is what I am NOT saying that is the source of my disempowerment.

And disempowerment is exactly what it is.

I am going to try to keep this as brief as I can while also maintaining meaningfulness.

The Power of Life is given to us by virtue of our creation. The Power within us is always seeking to be made whole. It is co-creative, dynamic, and presents as the Word. This is not word in the traditional sense. It is Word as Co-creative Principle declared into experience. It is literally Word becoming incarnate. A felt-imbued Word is literally a Force of nature.

Humans possess self-reflecting consciousness and as a result can consciously word our worlds. That is awakened consciousness at its best. Having said that we each have a habitual commentary, a narrative that is constantly running through our minds. We are always commenting on what is. What we seldom realize is that our commentary determines our experience of what is. The commentary is never Truth and is rarely even true. We are meaning making machines. What we say, goes. Most of it is lies. Yet we think it is our truth. It is the nature of consciousness. It is meant to consciously flow from center to circumference. We are meant to use the Power of our words to co-create the best experience possible. “In the beginning is the Word” is a literal Truth within us. When something occurs that disturbs us, we are meant to meet it with an awakened awareness that knows it is a misuse of Word that can be changed. Not out there. In here.

Everything originates in here.

Almost all of us talk about things that we do not want to be true. Problem is when we describe we prescribe. To pour attention on something as you talk about it is a prophesy. What we focus on is a movie of coming attractions. As ancient Truth teaches our “words go forth and do not return empty.” The Word is a force of consciousness that goes forth, is acted upon by the Law, and returns as our experience. This is always happening at the individual and at the collective level. When many people talk about the same thing, we call it reality. It is, but only by virtue of our agreement.

Our opinion of that is irrelevant. It is Law.

While it is a point of triggering for many people the power of confession is a transformative part of this unfolding process. I do not mean confession in terms of entering a booth and talking to a priest. Confession is a conscious act of speaking of what is troubling or disturbing for the sake of redeeming the energy. It involves the acknowledgment that circumstances are in some way a product of our words. It shares with another the emotional reactions that are moving inside of us. It claims ownership for the experience. It allows a trusted other to witness this process for the sake of transforming it. We are called to share what we are thinking, feeling, experiencing. Not to make it more solid. To allow it to become more fluid.

Because an infinitesimal number of people are owning the power of the co-creative word it is being collectively misused. “Fake news” is running rampant. Our words are used to diminish ourselves and dehumanize others. We speak of what we don’t want and then blame the circumstances on others. This is the foundation of the disempowerment previously mentioned. We humans are making the messes, and then not owning that it is we who doing it. We project our unconscious word-stories on those we disagree with. It is the perfect scenario to perpetuate the stories.

Okay, this may not be so brief.

There is enormous Power in focused, collective consciousness. When “two or more are gathered” and put forth harmonic Words transformation must ensue. It is Law. What we are seeing as reality today is a critical mass of people collectively misusing the power of the word. The Law is working perfectly. The problem is in the words we are putting forth. The even deeper challenge is very few are choosing to forgive at a Causal level.

Part of the power of confession is to speak truthfully about the relative experience that is outpicturing. It is describing what is unfolding in honest and fearless terms. It is value based. It is using words in service of Truth. It is calling out lies. It is courageously speaking Truth which IS power. It is speaking up even when it is scary and conflict-inducing. It feels risky indeed.

And it is not nearly as risky as remaining silent.

I freely admit that I have misused words countless times during my lifetime. I frequently fall into the trap of prophesying what I do not want to flow forth. I am much more awake to this than I used to be. And I have room to grow for sure.

As the leader of a spiritual community, I am acutely aware of how I am responsible for how my words affect those I serve. There are many things I feel prompted to call out in service of what I see as a greater Truth. There are ideologies playing out that violate my personal value system. Our planet is being pilfered and people are being dehumanized. Rights are being stolen. People are being needlessly tormented and even extinguished. This is clearly from my perspective. And I have a right to live from what feels true and contributing for me.

While I love expressing my vocation as I am blessed to do, I also feel a growing tension between what I feel called to say and how that will land with congregants of dystonic perspectives. I feel an increasing dissonance inside of me between what I personally want to say, and the responsibility I have to minister to all people. I often feel a ball of energy sticking in my throat, a suppressed word that is seeking to come forth. I also know that what is true for me is only true for me. I do not speak for the board of directors, the staff, or the congregation. I can choose to try and only speak what is light, breezy. And that has never been my truth. I am a messenger of Truth to the best of my ability. And I am unmistakably called to speak about what gets in the way of that Truth.

This tension between free expression and community responsibility is the source of my tiredness. Not calling out what I feel needs to be called out is quite frankly, exhausting. I sincerely believe that we are to use Principle in intensely practical ways. We are to use our words to call out lies and to proclaim Truth into being. It has to be both. We are to convert “fake news” into Faith news.

And so today I am writing about this tension, knowing I open myself to public opinion and other evaluations. I am willing to take that risk. I know there is a part of me that is called to continue to serve a community while also feeling the inherent limitations of it. And I embrace the very clear part of me that longs to only be responsible for what I am called to say. To be responsible for my words. For the impact they have. For the contribution I can make. I welcome the tension, and beyond willing to learn from it.

It has been the words I have been withholding that has disempowered me. That I know for sure. My silence has been collusion. I am clear that I must find a way to internalize and integrate what seeks to express while also honoring if not always respecting opposing forces to my values and spiritual Truths. I am only here to speak for myself. And I am still called to speak to others. I trust that the tension between those dynamics is going to birth my next right expression.

Speaking the Truth that is true for me both boldly and compassionately re-empowers me. It is my Word going forth to make a better world. It is speaking Truth which IS power.

Whether or not you agree with what I say I hope you will respect my right to say it. And if not, I bless you while continuing to speak my Truth.

Out loud.