Wednesday, June 10, 2015

A RADICAL REGIMEN

Since beginning my job as Sr. Minister of Unity of the Palm Beaches my days, weeks, and months are as dynamic as has been any time in my life. I am curiously both busy and relaxed, tired and yet energized, passionately engaged though almost completely unattached to outcomes.

My life has changed drastically. After working independently for several years it is a real shift to have a more regimented schedule. I am by nature a free spirit. I always loved being able to take off and go whenever the impulse rose within me. And yet here I am; working on a set schedule, in an out-of-home office, and adhering to contractual free time and often self imposed long hours. I am, after all, the boss.

I have become strangely comfortable living outside of my comfort zone. I have come to realize that I am no longer governed by my preferences. My deep desire to be of service is now more important to me than whether or not I can take off at a moments notice or choose to go down under for an indefinite period of time.

I have found my freedom in deciding to really and fully show up. While there are things I would love to have the time to do more of, I know the things that I am engaged in are relative to living my greatest life of love. I no longer fear commitment or being all in. I am more interested in the good for all than I am the good for me. It is liberating to know that life isn’t all about me and my personality wants. I have come to relish the gift of enduring discomfort in service of another Soul. That isn’t martyrdom. That is the recognition that I though I am A center of the Universe, I am not THE center of the Universe. My contributions to others matter to me. They don't define me, but they do resonate as purposeful. My own transformed pain has meaning when I can use it to help others.

I am finally getting over myself for the sake of my Self. I am finally free to give my greatest gifts. If to do that I need to stay planted and more scheduled then so be it. I lived the life of a gypsy for a long time. Now I am rooted. Even comparatively regimented.

And I am more radically expressed than ever.