Discernment is judgment with space around it.
I have judged judgment from my earliest recollections.
I think it is a church thing.
I remember being told in Sunday school “judge not.” Yet overriding that admonition the church was filled to capacity with blatant judgments. Perhaps the most obvious and insidious judgment was the judgment of judgment. It is inherent in the admonition. Which makes it a snare that is not easily escaped.
I also heard “judge by righteous judgment.”
Now, hold on just a minute.
Which is it?
Judge not, or judge by righteous judgment?
I have come to know that it is both.
However, or even if you pay attention to sacred writings from any tradition, they all contain relative leanings that point to an Absolute Reality. They point us in the direction of mystical perspectives that we are invited to embody and to then use to navigate this earthly realm. We do so imperfectly. And I for one have become quite friendly with that imperfection. Life in this sphere is an unfolding, a process. It is a relationship. We are not meant to be perfect. We are meant to be whole. Whole. That means our imperfections are meant to be accepted. Included. Embraced. And to whatever degree is possible, not judged.
And, human beings judge.
Beyond the perspective and the admonitions of scripture and sacred teachings the reality is that we judge. We all judge. We are wired to judge. The more we try not to judge the more locked into judgment we become. To “judge not” requires a level of judgment. It is just the way of it.
Which is where my potentially tricky little friend discernment comes in.
I recall in high school when I felt compelled to share with one of friends that what they were sharing with me was a judgment. Which of course meant that I was judging what they were sharing, and then mirroring it back as their shortcoming. My friend sharply retorted they it was not a judgment. It was discernment.
Truth be told I had to look up discernment later in a dictionary to be sure I knew what it really meant. Awe, the pre-Google days.
I do not recall exactly what Webster had to offer as a definition. I do remember the feeling. It occurred to me then what I share with you now: discernment is judgment with space around it.
While higher teaching informs me to judge not, I do. I simply do. I seem wired, programmed somehow to do so. While judgment does not seem to be optional in this human experience, believing my judgments is. Identifying with my judgements is indeed optional. Acting out on my judgments is a choice. To not do so is a choice that requires persistent practice and conviction. But it is a choice.
When I find myself judging something or someone, I step back from the mental screen on which my judgments occur. I take a pause, a conscious breath. I question as to whether or not I will choose to believe the judgment. I ponder whether or not I am identified with the judgment. I ask myself if I really want to act out from the judgment. These questions put some space around the judgment.
A name for that space is discernment.
In that space of discernment is the opportunity to “judge by righteous judgment.”
Completely friendly with the fact that all humans judge I give myself some space. Some breathing room. Some non-resistance. I judge, and I do not have to judge the fact that I find myself in judgment. It is for me a gamechanger.
In a world that looks like ours there are many things I find to judge on a daily basis. Injustice, corruption, bigotry, dishonesty, hypocrisy just to name a few. These things go against my value system and all that I hold sacred. I have been around long enough to know that if there is a deep charge around these things then they are a part of my own consciousness. In the broadest context of Oneness everything that is in the whole is in each part. So when I judge I am really always judging myself. That is the absolute Truth.
And then there is the relative.
When I work with the energetic charge of my judgments, I bring space to them. They soften, even if only slightly. In that softening space of relating, the judgment takes on a different quality. There is a bit of distance between me and that which I am judging. Adding into the experience the friendliness with the fact that I am judging brings even more interior space.
A name for that space is discernment.
This has brought increased peace to my days and expanded awareness to my moments. I know longer think I should not judge. As a result, I am not doing battle with my judgments. I bring some space to them, and that space is discernment. An added bonus to this is, is that I fear other people’s judgments far less. I know that I will be judged. I do not choose to judge you for judging me. I don’t need to go to war over the given that people are always at some level judging each other. If I do not make it a problem, it is not a problem.
It has become discernment at a practical impactful level.
And so, I complete this blog with the awareness that I always have around my writings, lectures, classes, public expressions: this will be judged.
If you take a risk to put it out there, then the out there will undoubtedly judge what you put out. It is just the way it is. It is inherent in the choose to express. Because I do not think that it should not be so the judgments do not have authority over me. I am free.
However you choose to judge my words consider putting some space around it. And know that discernment is judgment with space around it.
And in that space you will be judging righteously your judgment.
